Our Sons

Connor and Zachary

Our twin boys were both a blessing and a surprise! We had been told by a lot of doctors that we wouldn't be able to have children. We tried for 4 years, had a few miscarriages and a lot of disappointment, so we finally stopped trying. Once we did that, a funny and amazing thing happened.

I was off for summer vacation from my job as a Teachers Assistant, it was July and I felt like I had the flu! I went to the doctors and he checked me over and did a pregnancy test, it came back positive, which is nothing new for me, as it had happened countless times before. I chuckled and went on my way. A few hours later, I really wasn't feeling well ended up in emergency, where they did the same test with the same results, I insisted on a blood test, which I made them do twice and it was positive both times, I can't tell you how happy we were!

It was a very hard pregnancy, I was nauseous 24 - 7, I would throw up at the sight of water! The doctors finally confirmed at 5 months that were having twins, and put me on antinausiants, as by this time, I had lost a considerable amount of weight, which you never would have known! I still couldn't keep much down!

I was in and out of the hospital with ruptured membranes, which meant I was losing amniotic fluid around Connor's sac, he was the baby on the top, Zach was on the bottom, head down ready to go from 5 months on! Then at 28 weeks they hospitalized me on strict bed rest as they were very concerned about the pregnancy, and felt I would deliver soon, but I managed to hang on longer.

At 32 weeks, I began to feel a funny shaking sensation where Zach was, it felt like shivering, but from the inside, I expressed my concern to the dr., but he said it was just movement and not to worry. I did, this continued for 2 more weeks, at this time a nurse on the night shift felt it, and didn't feel it was normal, she called the intern on call, who gave me an ultrasound and decided Zach was in distress. They decided to induce me on the following day, and it didn't work. The next evening, I went on my own and after 23 1/2 hours the boys were born!

Zach was born first, and not responding, they immediately took him away to work on him, at this point really afraid for him, I had to get Connor out and he was sideways and had no intentions of cooperating, at the very last minute, he turned and they were born 23 minutes apart. They were both a good size for twins, Connor, was a lot larger than his brother at 7lbs 9oz, Zach weighed in at 5lbs 2oz, and was having a very hard time.

It was at the point when they removed the placenta that they discovered why. They had Twin to Twin Transfusion Disease, which means Connor was taking all the red blood cells, nutrition from Zach, this had been going on for awhile, about 3 weeks, and if it had continued for another couple of days, Zach would have died. The shaking I felt was a warning sign! Thank goodness someone heard my concern, I will always be grateful to her! This is also when we discovered the boys were identical twins, as the form of the TTD they had only happens when they are identical. Another sign of the TTD was Zach was Very yellow and Jaundice looking from being deprived and Connor was Lobster red from having too much. There was no mixing them up then! And not much has changed; Connor still takes more than his share of things from Zach!

After a week in NICU, Zach recovered on his own with out a blood transfusion, which they thought he would have to have, and started gaining weight as he had dropped to 3 lbs very quickly after birth. They kept us another week so Connor could get treated for Jaundice, Zach eventually joined him there and they sent us home, only to return for another 7 days, as I got a severe Staff infection and needed to be hospitalized, they got more Jaundice treatment. Finally we got to go home.

From there on we started to notice a lot of things that weren't going right and it was blamed on the fact they are twins. If you go to our page on the signs we noticed and it's all there from birth to 6, their age now.

This year we learned that along with the Fragile X Syndrome, both boys fall under the Autism umbrella as well. Zachary also has issues with psychosis and other disabilities we are really not sure of because of his difficult time in utero, being deprived of nutrients and his deprivation of Oxygen at birth. He has always seemed more affected by his disabilities than Connor and you can see it alot now that they are older. Connor has some Autistic Characteristics but for the most part does not seem as limited in his ability to learn and put into place new routines, tasks etc., Which is amazing since they scored almost identically on their IQ testing!!!

They do a lot of things we were told they wouldn't do, they talk quite well, are learning some language skills in school, some math, are pretty much toilet trained, they are pretty independent compared to a lot of kids with FX, they are coming along quite nicely in a lot of areas. They are very unique individuals.

The boys are on some Medications now. We have gone through so many through the years. They are on very little now, Connor only on sleep medication, Melatonin and stuff for his asthma. He still only sleeps as much as usual, sometimes he will sleep in. Zach is on 1 Rispridal pill in the afternoon for his anxiety and melatonin for sleep. He does sleep well, better than his brother!!!

The boys are in an amazing school, after wonderful Early Ed years into a school that wasted their grade 1 and 2 years, we have finally found a match!! Their school is amazing, the staff are beyond words. Connor is in an Autistic program and is a totally different kid! He is doing so much in that room, his teacher and his two assistants are so wonderful. He loves going to school and rarely has a bad day. He is separated from Zach at school and that helps the behavior issues alot! He is such a grown up guy now! Zach too, was put into a Community learning class to learn at his own pace, and is doing so well. He has a new teacher this year, as his retired last year and it was time for him to move up. It looks like a good match and the 2 years he had in the other room changed him a lot too. His teacher was so gentle and caring, his assistants were so patient and amazing with him! They even visited him when he went into the hospital to be assessed for his behavioral issues. I can not thank their Assistants, Teachers, and Principal enough for all the support and love they have shown our children and our family.

Zach has a great sense of humor and loves a good laugh and playing tricks on people. He is so funny, affectionate and sweet. He is Grandpa and Grandmas boy, loves to spend time with them. He speaks very well and figures things out so quickly! He is the instigator in a lot of things and it is really hard to pull one over on him! He loves to get into his dads tools and take things apart and is very musical. His favorite things in the whole world right now are the Wiggles and Shania, he loves watching DVD's, building things with his dad and eating, and eating.....

Connor is very sensitive, cuddly and the muscle behind Zach's schemes. He cries very easily and gets his feelings hurt all the time, but he is the most affectionate, loving little boy. He gets attached to people and gives you his heart and soul! He to loves his grandparents and would live there if we let him! He loves to be in the kitchen helping to cook, clean and prepare his own concoctions. His favorite thing in the whole world is Batman and he loves to cook, be at school, and help his mom out around the house and run errands. He is becoming very social!!

We still grieve at times for them, I really still don't think for either one of us that we have fully grieved for any of them, we don't allow ourselves to dwell on it but some days get overwhelmed and exhausted! Still they are so special to us, we would never trade them for the world, I just hope that the rest of the world sees them like we do and accept them for who they are. They tell us that they want to be a firefighter and a tow truck driver, they want to have a family and a job, they understand that's what people do. They have dreams and we will support them in anything they choose and love them no matter what comes of it. We love them for who they are, who they want to be and neither of us would have it any different.

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